How to Say Friend in Chinese: 15+ Words for Friend, Bestie, Bro, and Ride-or-Die…

Open Google Translate, type the word friend, and you get one answer: 朋友 (péngyǒu).

That is true. It is also a little misleading.

After a long time of living between English and Chinese, the most interesting thing about this word is not the pronunciation or the characters. It is that 朋友 (péngyǒu) does not mean exactly what friend means in English. The relationship it points to is different. The expectations are different. The way you earn the title is different.

This article walks through the words Chinese people actually use day to day — from the soft, secret-sharing 闺蜜 (guīmì, female bestie) to the loyalty-coded 老铁 (lǎotiě, ride-or-die) — plus the cultural backstory behind why Chinese friendship tends to feel heavier, slower, and stickier than its English cousin.

You will also learn one phrase that can sound romantic if you say it wrong. Stick around for that part.

Quick Answer: Friend in Chinese

How to Say Friend in Chinese

朋友 (péngyǒu, friend) is your starting point. It works in every situation, formal or casual.

Character breakdown:

• 朋 (péng) — historically pictured two strings of cowrie shells side by side, which came to mean companions or peers.
• 友 (yǒu) — two right hands joined, suggesting friendship and mutual aid.

Quick examples:

• 他是我朋友。 (Tā shì wǒ péngyǒu.) — He is my friend.
• 我有很多朋友。 (Wǒ yǒu hěn duō péngyǒu.) — I have many friends.
• 我们是朋友。 (Wǒmen shì péngyǒu.) — We are friends.

Pronunciation tip: 朋 (péng) carries the second tone, rising. 友 (yǒu) is usually pronounced lightly in casual speech, so the word sounds more like péng-you than péng-YǑU.

What Friend Actually Means (And Why It Is Not Quite Friend)

In English, especially American English, the word friend is generous. You can call your coworker a friend, your neighbor a friend, the person you have had two coffees with a friend.

In Chinese, that same person is usually 认识的人 (rènshi de rén, someone I know) until enough trust gets built. The word 朋友 (péngyǒu) carries weight. Saying it casually can almost feel like overclaiming.

This is why phrases like:

• 好朋友 (hǎo péngyǒu) — good friend
• 真朋友 (zhēn péngyǒu) — real, true friend
• 老朋友 (lǎo péngyǒu) — old friend, someone you have known forever

are not just intensifiers the way very good friend is in English. They mark real distinctions in how close the relationship actually is.

This pattern — language carrying social weight that English does not track — shows up across Chinese vocabulary. Our deep dive into how Chinese family vocabulary works hits the same nerve: every relationship gets its own specific word because the relationships themselves matter.

The 8 Words for Friend Chinese People Actually Use

Here is where it gets fun. Mandarin has different words for different kinds of friends, and using the right one makes you sound less like a textbook and more like someone who has been around.

1. 朋友 (péngyǒu) — friend (general, safe default)

The all-purpose word. Works in every register, every region.

• 你是我朋友。 (Nǐ shì wǒ péngyǒu.) — You are my friend.

2. 好朋友 (hǎo péngyǒu) — good friend

Used a lot. Signals a real connection, but not necessarily your absolute closest.

• 我们是好朋友。 (Wǒmen shì hǎo péngyǒu.) — We are good friends.

3. 最好的朋友 (zuì hǎo de péngyǒu) — best friend

Literal best friend. Slightly formal-sounding. Younger Chinese will often pick 闺蜜 (guīmì) or 死党 (sǐdǎng) instead.

• 她是我最好的朋友。 (Tā shì wǒ zuì hǎo de péngyǒu.) — She is my best friend.

How to Say Bestie in Chinese

4. 闺蜜 (guīmì) — bestie, female best friend in Chinese

Female friendship only. Soft, intimate, the one you tell about your crush. The character 闺 (guī) historically referred to women’s inner quarters, so 闺蜜 (guīmì) carries this sense of someone allowed into your private world. Massive on Chinese social media.

• 我和闺蜜一起去旅行。 (Wǒ hé guīmì yīqǐ qù lǚxíng.) — My bestie and I went on a trip together.

Further reading: Female Friendship in Chinese Historical Dramas (The #5 Pick Is Surprisingly Popular)

5. 哥们儿 (gēmenr) — bro, dude

Male friendship only, casual, leans northern Chinese (Beijing especially). The 儿 (r) ending is the giveaway it is coming from the north.

• 他是我哥们儿。 (Tā shì wǒ gēmenr.) — He is my bro.

6. 老铁 (lǎotiě) — ride-or-die, iron-strong friend (slang)

Originated in northeastern China and exploded online thanks to Douyin (抖音, Dǒuyīn) and Kuaishou (快手, Kuàishǒu). 铁 (tiě) means iron — the friend who stays solid no matter what.

Bro vibe, but not limited to men. Both men and women can use 老铁 for someone loyal, familiar, and solid.

• 老铁，没毛病！ (Lǎotiě, méi máobìng!) — Bro, no problem!

Also read: Chinese Internet Slang and Social Media Words You’ll Actually See on Douyin and Xiaohongshu

7. 死党 (sǐdǎng) — ride-or-die crew

Literally translates to death-party. Sounds darker than it is. Refers to the friend or small group you would do anything for. Often used by teens and twenty-somethings.

• 我们是死党。 (Wǒmen shì sǐdǎng.) — We are ride or die.

The Chinese Term for Childhood Friend

8. 发小 (fàxiǎo) — childhood friend

Specifically the friend you grew up with, the one who knew you before puberty, who has the embarrassing photos. Very specific, very precious. Northern Chinese in flavor; southern Chinese sometimes say 从小一起长大的朋友 (cóngxiǎo yīqǐ zhǎngdà de péngyǒu, friend I grew up with) instead.

• 他是我发小。 (Tā shì wǒ fàxiǎo.) — He is my childhood friend.

Save this list before your next Chinese conversation or pin this guide to your favorite board on Pinterest — the next time you are texting a Chinese friend, you will have eight choices instead of one.

Other Chinese Words Related to Friendship

Read on: Where Dazi Fits Between a Friend and an Acquaintance

Simplified vs Traditional Chinese

Most Chinese learning materials use simplified Chinese, but if you’re watching Taiwanese dramas, reading Hong Kong media, or chatting with overseas Chinese communities, you may also see traditional characters.

The Female Friend Trap (Please Read This)

Here is something Mandarin textbooks rarely warn you about.

If you say 女性朋友 (nǚxìng péngyǒu, female friend) or 男性朋友 (nánxìng péngyǒu, male friend), you literally mean a friend who is female or a friend who is male — but depending on context, native speakers may hear it as someone you might be romantically involved with. The line is not always clean.

Worse trap:

• 男朋友 (nán péngyǒu) — this means boyfriend, not a male friend.
• 女朋友 (nǚ péngyǒu) — this means girlfriend, not a female friend.

So how do you say a friend who happens to be female? Use:

• 朋友 (péngyǒu, friend) — just friend, and let context handle the gender
• 同学 (tóngxué) — classmate
• 同事 (tóngshì) — coworker
• 闺蜜 (guīmì) — female best friend, if she really is your bestie
• 一个女生朋友 (yī gè nǚshēng péngyǒu) — literally a girl friend, the safer phrasing

When in doubt, the simpler word is the safer word.

If you want the most casual spoken version, Chinese people also say:

我一个朋友，男的。
wǒ yī gè péngyǒu, nán de
A friend of mine, a guy.

我一个朋友，女的。
wǒ yī gè péngyǒu, nǚ de
A friend of mine, a girl.

How to Say My Friend in Chinese (Different Situations)

A few quick patterns Mandarin learners search for all the time:

• 我的朋友 (wǒ de péngyǒu) — my friend (formal or written)
• 我朋友 (wǒ péngyǒu) — my friend (casual or spoken; the 的 (de) is often dropped)
• 我最好的朋友 (wǒ zuì hǎo de péngyǒu) — my best friend
• 我朋友们 (wǒ péngyǒumen) — my friends (plural)
• 你好我的朋友 (nǐ hǎo wǒ de péngyǒu) — hello my friend (sounds slightly translated; native speakers usually just use the person’s name).
• 谢谢朋友 (xièxie péngyǒu) — thanks, friend (warm and casual)
• 你是我最好的朋友 (nǐ shì wǒ zuì hǎo de péngyǒu) — you are my best friend
• 你是我最好的闺蜜 (nǐ shì wǒ zuì hǎo de guīmì) — you are my bestie (female friendship)
• 你朋友在哪里 (nǐ péngyǒu zài nǎlǐ) — where is your friend
• 早上好，我的朋友 (zǎoshang hǎo, wǒ de péngyǒu) — good morning, my friend (grammatically correct, but sounds poetic or translated in everyday Chinese)

Side note: greeting a friend in Chinese usually does not include the word friend the way English does. You would just use their name, a nickname, or even 嘿 (hēi, hey).

Cute Chinese Friendship Phrases (Great for Captions and Tattoos)

These are the phrases that show up on bracelets, mugs, social media captions, and yes — tattoos. One quick warning on tattoos: please run any character past a native speaker before it goes on your skin. The internet is full of regret.

• 友谊地久天长 (yǒuyì dì jiǔ tiān cháng) — friendship lasts forever (literally as long as the earth and sky; this is also the Chinese title of Auld Lang Syne)
• 一生的朋友 (yīshēng de péngyǒu) — friend for life
• 患难见真情 (huànnàn jiàn zhēnqíng) — true friendship is revealed in hardship
• 海内存知己，天涯若比邻 (hǎi nèi cún zhījǐ, tiānyá ruò bǐlín) — a true friend feels close even across the world (classical Tang dynasty line, still quoted constantly)
• 朋友一生一起走 (péngyǒu yīshēng yīqǐ zǒu) — friends walk through life together (from a famous Hong Kong song; deeply nostalgic for Chinese millennials)
• 有福同享，有难同当 (yǒu fú tóng xiǎng, yǒu nàn tóng dāng) — share the good, share the hard

Pick one. Send it to a friend today.

Read on:

• Cute in Chinese Is More Complicated Than You Think

• Pretty, Beautiful, or Gorgeous? Chinese Words That Don’t Mean the Same Thing

Friendship in Chinese Culture (The Part That Changes How You See Everything)

Friendship in Chinese culture is not built the same way friendship is built in the United States or most of the English-speaking world.

A few patterns worth knowing:

Friendship is slow. It develops through shared meals, repeated favors, time spent. The first dinner is just a dinner. By the fifth, you might be starting to count as a friend. By the tenth, you probably are.

Loyalty matters more than chemistry. The phrase 患难见真情 (huànnàn jiàn zhēnqíng, true feelings are revealed in hardship) is one of the most quoted things in Chinese friendship culture. A friend who shows up when things go badly is more trusted than a friend who is just fun to be around.

There is a concept of 人情 (rénqíng), roughly meaning interpersonal favors or social debts. Friends do things for each other and quietly remember. It is not transactional in a cold way — it is more like an unspoken running tab that gets balanced over years. Westerners sometimes find this uncomfortable. Chinese friends usually find it warm.

The childhood friend is unusually important. The 发小 (fàxiǎo, childhood friend) holds a special place in Chinese life. Lunar New Year reunions, weddings, big life moments — these are the people who get invited, sometimes ahead of newer friends.

Once you are in, you are in for a long time. Chinese friendships tend to last decades. People keep up with elementary school friends. Group chats survive moves across continents.

It is a different model. Slower to enter, harder to leave.

Read Next: What Happens When a Friendship Ends Without a Goodbye

Common Mistakes Foreigners Make

A short list of stumbles to watch for:

1. Calling someone you just met 朋友 (péngyǒu). Use 认识的人 (rènshi de rén, someone I know) or just their name until trust is built.
2. Confusing 男朋友 (nán péngyǒu) and 女朋友 (nǚ péngyǒu) with platonic friends. As covered above, these mean boyfriend and girlfriend.
3. Translating hi my friend literally as 你好我的朋友 (Nǐ hǎo wǒ de péngyǒu). It is not wrong, but it sounds translated. Native speakers just use the name.
4. Skipping the right register. 老铁 (lǎotiě) in a job interview sounds even odder. Match the word to the setting.
5. Tattooing the character 友 (yǒu) alone. It is technically friendship, but it feels incomplete on skin. A full phrase like 友谊地久天长 (yǒuyì dì jiǔ tiān cháng) or 一生的朋友 (yīshēng de péngyǒu) reads better.

FAQ

How do you say friend in Mandarin?

The standard word is 朋友 (péngyǒu). It works in every situation.

How do you say hello friend in Chinese?

The literal translation is:

你好，朋友。
Nǐ hǎo, péngyǒu.
Hello, friend.

But native speakers usually do not talk like this in real life. Most people would simply:

• use the person’s name
• use a nickname
• say 嘿 (hēi, hey)

That is why hello friend in Chinese can sound slightly translated or dramatic depending on context.

How do you say be water, my friend in Chinese?

The famous Bruce Lee quote is commonly translated as:

像水一样吧，我的朋友。
Xiàng shuǐ yīyàng ba, wǒ de péngyǒu.
Be like water, my friend.

What is best friend in Chinese?

The literal translation is 最好的朋友 (zuì hǎo de péngyǒu). In casual modern Chinese, women often say 闺蜜 (guīmì) and men often say 哥们儿 (gēmenr) or 死党 (sǐdǎng).

What does pengyou mean literally?

朋 (péng) originally pictured paired strings of cowrie shells (companions), and 友 (yǒu) showed two joined hands (mutual aid). Together, the word carries the sense of paired companions who support each other.

What is guimi?

A female best friend. The word combines 闺 (guī, inner women’s quarters in old Chinese homes) and 蜜 (mì, honey or sweet). It describes the friend allowed into your private world.

What is laotie?

Originally a northeastern slang term, now used nationwide and especially on social media. It means a ride-or-die friend. 铁 (tiě) means iron, so the image is iron-strong loyalty.

How do Chinese people refer to close friends?

It depends on age and gender. Common picks: 好朋友 (hǎo péngyǒu), 死党 (sǐdǎng), 闺蜜 (guīmì), 哥们儿 (gēmenr), 老铁 (lǎotiě).

Does pengyou mean boyfriend or girlfriend?

朋友 (péngyǒu) on its own means friend. But 男朋友 (nán péngyǒu) means boyfriend and 女朋友 (nǚ péngyǒu) means girlfriend. The character order matters.

What is the difference between pengyou and haoyou?

好友 (hǎoyǒu) is slightly more formal and literary, and shows up a lot in written Chinese — including on social media, where adding someone is called 加好友 (jiā hǎoyǒu, add friend). In spoken Chinese, 朋友 (péngyǒu) is far more common.

Final Thoughts

The fastest way to feel less foreign in a language is to use the right word for the right person. Pick three words from this article — maybe 朋友 (péngyǒu), 闺蜜 (guīmì) or 哥们儿 (gēmenr), and 发小 (fàxiǎo) — and use one of them this week. Text it to a friend. Caption a photo. Try it out loud.

That is how 朋友 (péngyǒu) stops being a vocabulary entry and starts being a relationship.

If pieces like this are your thing — Chinese the way Chinese people actually speak it, not the textbook version — join the newsletter at stellarchinese.com. One short, no-fluff lesson a week. Unsubscribe whenever.

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• Things You Should Never Do at a Chinese Dinner Table
• Chinese Chopstick Rules Most Foreigners Never Learn
• Chinese Superstitions Explained: Lucky Numbers, Chopsticks, Gifts, and More
• The Song Every Chinese Person Knows by Heart
• What Not to Give Chinese People as Gifts
• Why Chinese People Love the Number 8